Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
Randomize
