Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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