Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
Randomize
