but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
Randomize
