im drinking this country out of the recession.
I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
Randomize
