the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
Randomize