wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
Randomize
