I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Randomize
