What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
Randomize
