I think my vagina is haunted
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
Randomize