Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize
