I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
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