But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what.
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
I am mentally ready for anal.
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
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