Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
Terrible idea I love it
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize
