You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
I think that's the first time i've seen 'you look like an ugly version of my ex' work as a pickup line
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
I’m drunk and naked and looking for my charger - title of my autobiography.
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
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