you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
Randomize
