y did u give ur computer a hand job?
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
Randomize
