This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
I don't know, Alex. I don't know. I lost my keys, my debit card, my makeup bag, broke my purse, had to have someone cut my shoe off, I have no idea where my costume is. I woke up next to the biggest douchebag I know and made out with this other guy while SIMULTANEOUSLY talking on the phone to the guy I'm talking to...
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
Randomize
