Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
Pants are for mortals
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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