He is such a slut. More and more my type.
Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
Randomize
