you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
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