I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
Randomize