She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
Randomize
