5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
Randomize
