I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
I wish you could order shots online.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
you told grandpa to call you daddy
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
Randomize