U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
Randomize
