Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
Randomize
