Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
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