We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
Randomize