He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
Randomize
