Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
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