So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
Randomize
