so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
Houston, we have a blender
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Randomize
