she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
