I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
Malibu has added tequila to its rum. It's like when two beautiful gaybies come together an spawn a unicorn that only cries jellybean tears.
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
Randomize
