Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
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