Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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