So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
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