Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
I don't know whether I should be pissed that there's glitter in my bed or proud that there's semen in there too.
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
Randomize
