Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
