I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
Randomize
