My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
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