i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
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