apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
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