was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
