I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
Randomize
