Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
The maid moved your bed and found almost 40 used condoms and wrappers. She just looks at me and says "Dave?"
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Randomize
