My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
