she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
Welcome to drunk texts. Live from Margaritaville, it's Saturday night!!!
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
Randomize
