PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
Last night the nurse at the ER told me that she wished all her drunk patients were like me. Then she commented on my socks...
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
Just invented taco cereal.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
Randomize
