I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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