There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
Randomize
